When I was a young girl I would dream of my wedding day all
white, flowers, bridesmaids and of course changing my name. It wasn’t until I was a woman and actually
proposed to that the panic set in: No white please, my bridesmaid was a boy, I
forgot to arrange flowers and then there was My name, I’m going to lose my name!
I battled with it and my husband to be. He was wondering what the big deal was and I
was creating a very detailed story as to why I shouldn’t. I had travelled the world, visited my parent’s
birth countries and felt as though my name was that stamp of history I could
not let go of. (Do I make sense?) Was I over reacting? Creating a big deal for
just a name?
I am now married 7 years and have finally completed the last
name change on my Medicare and I will be honest I was a little sad. I was not pressured in any way to change my name;
I think my husband was very understanding to my mini melt down. But I had not committed either way and it was
getting messy when having to show ID and having maiden name and married names
on different things.
What made me change my mind?
Having babies and wanting us all to have the same name was
the clincher for me. It’s almost like it
came full circle as I think most things do in life. I still had that moment when naming my first
born of losing my heritage by not giving them my name so we came to an
agreement that all our children’s middle name would be my maiden name. This was the best decision and it makes me
proud to see my maiden name on their birth certificate and knowing that they
will always know their mum’s name!
When brides & grooms come into the showroom and fill out
the paper work it is always interesting to see how each bride reacts to the
whole name. I think it should always be
discussed between a couple and let it be known that a woman does not
necessarily want to keep her name in aid of Women’s rights but for their own
right’s. We were born with these names and
sometimes feel quite attached to them emotionally, historically or just because
it’s a better name than HIS!
Is it all in the name or is it just a name?
Please feel free to share your name change story or idea for
other potential brides.
FH
